Ways to Charm a Kunoichi
by Patricia Stewart
Summary: Kakashi Hatake likes someone! However, what will unfold when he takes the help of a certain book to charm his special kunoichi? Kakashi x Shizune
1. Prologue

**A/N: Well, I just randomly got this idea and began writing this, so please be nice if it doesn't turn out to be okay. In my story, Sasuke is still with Team 7. I know that I fantasise a bit too much, but come on! This is FANfiction. Anyway, I hope you enjoy reading this! **

**Disclaimer: I [tragically] do not own Naruto. It belongs to the great Masashi Kishimoto. I just own parts of the storyline. 'Ways to Charm a Kunoichi' does not belong completely to me. I copied '12 Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches' from the Internet and adapted it into 'Ways to Charm a Kunoichi'. **

PROLOGUE

Lady Tsunade took a sip of sake as she turned a page of the Konoha Mission Record Book. She sighed as she read it. The page she had turned to showed the mission records of Hatake Kakashi.

Hatake Kakashi was a genius ninja. In his childhood, he was known as 'Konoha's Prodigy'. He was highly skilled and he always accomplished his missions flawlessly. Lady Tsunade was proud to have a ninja like him in the village.

At that moment, there was a knock on the door of her office. "Come in!" Lady Tsunade called. The wooden door swung open and Shizune, her attendant, secretary as well as a good friend, entered.

"What is it, Shizune?" Lady Tsunade asked. "Well, Tsunade-sama, I have just gotten a letter from Nara Shikaku. There is an 'Only for the Eyes of the Hokage' stamp on its envelope," Shizune answered, handing the letter to Lady Tsunade.

"Hmmm," Lady Tsunade said. "I'll take a look at it."

Shizune smiled and was about to exit the Hokage's office, when Lady Tsunade asked, "Shizune, have you ever thought of getting married?"

Shocked, Shizune whipped around. Marriage was generally a sensitive topic with Lady Tsunade, as she wasn't tied in wedlock herself. Once, Shizune had said the 'M-Word' in front of Lady Tsunade and she had to stay in bed for three days straight. However, on that particular day, extremely oddly, the Godaime had herself broached the subject!

Lady Tsunade smirked and said, "You should really think about settling down now."

Shizune stuttered, "Ts-Ts-Tsunade-s-sama..."

"It's about time you found a man, Shizune. For instance," Lady Tsunade said, looking down and tapping Kakashi's mission records with the knuckle of her right index finger. "Take Hatake Kakashi. He is strong, skilled, smart and overflowing with talent, not to mention handsome. Look at him, Shizune! He's perfect for you!"

"What are you talking about, Tsunade-sama?" Shizune asked, mortified.

"At least you stopped stammering," smiled Lady Tsunade. Shizune looked down, appearing to be very interested in the floor.

"Anyway, about you and Kakashi," continued Lady Tsunade. "I see no reason why he won't like you. You're kind-hearted, gentle, intelligent and reliable. And, Shizune, you have certain innocent comeliness to you that I am sure will make a shinobi like Kakashi go mad."

"Come on, Tsunade-sama! Kakashi-san and I are on completely different levels. There's no way that he will look twice at someone like me. Why will he like me when there are so many other kunoichi in Konoha who are much greater and more powerful than I am?"

Little did Shizune know, however, that she was totally wrong.

**A/N: So...what do you think of my prologue? I hope it's okay. Please review to tell me what you feel about it. If you wish, you can PM me too. Constructive criticism and suggestions are more than welcome. The fun will start in the next few chapters. I really like Shizune and I think that she and Kakashi should definitely get together. Thanks a ton for taking the time to read this! Au revoir!**


	2. A New Book

**A/N: Here I come with the first chapter of 'Ways to Charm a Kunoichi'! I hope you enjoy reading it! Please don't forget to review!**

CHAPTER 1: A NEW BOOK

Lord Jiraiya looked up from his writing pad as the doorbell of his house rang. 'Hmm...It must be a salesman,' thought Lord Jiraiya, continuing to run his pen across the paper resting on his pad. The bell went a few more times, but Lord Jiraiya chose to ignore it.

However, the person who was at his door seemed to be very persistent for he [or she, for that matter] did not cease ringing his doorbell. Highly annoyed, Lord Jiraiya threw down his pen and stood up, ready to give the person who had dared to disturb his writing a good telling-off.

Lord Jiraiya stomped to his door and opened it roughly. His eyes widened in surprise when he saw that the person standing at his door was not a salesman, but the famous Copy Ninja, Hatake Kakashi.

"Aah, Kakashi, it's you," Lord Jiraiya said, stepping aside to allow the grey-haired Jounin to enter his abode. "Good afternoon, Jiraiya-sama," Kakashi greeted the Sannin, shutting the door behind him. "I hope my visit hasn't bothered you."

"No, young man, not at all," Lord Jiraiya laughed. "It's just that I thought you were one of those irritating salesmen. I hate them, you know." Kakashi grinned under his mask. "Now, do take a seat, Kakashi," Lord Jiraiya said, sitting down. Kakashi followed suit.

"Tell me, can I get you anything? Tea? Juice? Sake?" Lord Jiraiya asked. "Oh no, please don't take any trouble, Jiraiya-sama," Kakashi answered. "I came here to ask for your advice on, ahem, a certain, well..."

Lord Jiraiya leaned forward, his interest piqued by the Copy Ninja's words. "So, what is it?" He questioned.

"Er...I-I can't really find words to explain," Kakashi said, looking down. Now, Lord Jiraiya was paying full attention to the Sharingan-wielder. "Let me guess," Lord Jiraiya spoke. "Is this about a woman?"

Kakashi started. He stared at the white-haired Sannin. Lord Jiraiya grinned and asked gleefully, "Who's the lucky lady, Kakashi?" "Wh-Wh...I-I-I..." Kakashi stuttered. Lord Jiraiya's grin widened and he leaned even closer to Kakashi. "Come on, Kakashi, you've got to tell me!" He exclaimed. Kakashi looked down and mumbled a name under his breath.

"I'm sorry, Kakashi, but I didn't quite catch that," Lord Jiraiya sang, his eyes twinkling. So Kakashi had a crush on someone, did he?

"Shizune!" Kakashi said, raising his voice a bit.

The moment he heard the name of the kunoichi Kakashi had feelings for, Lord Jiraiya let out a shocked 'What?!' and anime fell. Kakashi raised his eyebrows and asked, "What's wrong, Jiraiya-sama?"

Lord Jiraiya sat up straight and looked at Kakashi as if his senses had gone on vacation. "Are you okay?" Kakashi questioned, concerned.

"I'm fine. It's you who has gone cuckoo in the head."

"I don't know what you mean, Jiraiya-sama."

"You have the dibs for Tsunade's apprentice!"

"Er..."

"Do you have any idea of the trouble you are inviting? I can't believe you, Kakashi! Tsunade will pound you into a pulp of flesh and bones if she finds about your feelings for Shizune!"

"But surely you can help me out!"

"You're crazy."

"Please, Jiraiya-sama?"

"Oh, all right, then. But don't blame me if something goes wrong."

Lord Jiraiya got up from his seat and exited the room. He was back a minute later with a book in his hands. He threw it to Kakashi, who caught it expertly. He turned it over and read its title: WAYS TO CHARM A KUNOICHI

"I wrote that a long time ago; when I was in my prime. It ought to help you. But like I said, if your wooing venture doesn't go well, don't you dare to accuse me," Lord Jiraiya said.

Kakashi smiled under his mask and spoke, "Thanks a lot for this, Jiraiya-sama. I knew I could depend upon you for guidance!"

Lord Jiraiya rolled his eyes as Kakashi got up to leave. "Just be careful," he muttered under his breath.

**A/N: Thanks for taking the time to read this! I hope you liked it! Also, I'm planning to have a side-story with another couple, so if you have any suggestions, feel free to tell me.**

**P.S: I DIG REVIEWS.**


	3. Chapter 1: How To Be Noticed

**A/N: Hey! This is the second chapter of 'Ways to Charm a Kunoichi'. I hope you enjoy reading it. Please review the chapter. If you want to make your review more private, don't hesitate to PM me. I guess I'll stop my blabbering now and let you read on.**

CHAPTER 2: HOW TO BE NOTICED

Kakashi Hatake went straight home from Lord Jiraiya's place. He made himself a cup of tea and got comfortable on a sofa. Then, he flipped open the book Lord Jiraiya had given him and began to read it.

_**PREFACE**_

_Hello, friend. Obviously, you fancy a kunoichi and want to charm her. I, Jiraiya, am going to help you to get that girl of yours. You may think that getting the kunoichi of your choice is really very tough, but trust me, it is not. You just have to be adequately advised, which is why you are reading this book now. Just relax. I assure you, my piece of work will guide you to your woman just as a candle guides a person down a dark corridor._

Kakashi sighed as he turned to the first chapter. He hoped that he would charm Shizune before some other shinobi got her.

_**CHAPTER 1: HOW TO BE NOTICED**_

_You always see that one kunoichi that you just wish would notice you, yet for all the times you have tried anything you could come up with you still have had no luck. That is why I am helping you to be noticed by your special kunoichi._

_Let's start with your appearance. When attempting to get noticed, do not wear any of the three 'S':_

_Silly clothes_

_Stained garments_

_Striped pants [Believe me, kunoichis really get irritated by them]_

_However, you do want to wear the ABC tips for clothing:_

_Always well fit clothing_

_Basic colours [nothing too bold]_

_Clean clothing_

_*If you wear the same costume every day, don't make any major changes to your clothes. Just appear clean, neat and tidy at all times. If you wish, you can make subtle changes to what you wear._

_Now that we have that down, let us talk about what you will not want to say:_

_How you love hogging your favourite food_

_Anything that makes you look selfish_

_Anything that shows how much you love to brag_

_Anything that gives away your obsession with creepy things_

_Though you do want to start topics that include:_

_Complimenting her_

_Why you think she is the best_

_Next, you must deal with confidence. So, even if you are scared you must look like you are not. Stand up straight, speak clearly and act like yourself (just a bit). Then, try engaging her in a conversation, maybe ask her what her favourite hobby is or if she thinks the Hokage is doing a good job with his/her new policy._

_Oh no...I have still not been noticed. Calm down if this happens to you, continue dping everything above daily. Here are a few good topic starters:_

_Hi, my name is (insert your full name). What's yours?_

_Did you hear that they are expanding the hospital?_

_What is it like to work as a/n (insert her profession/job)?_

_What do you think of the new ramen at Ichiraku?_

_Have you read (insert the name of a book)?_

_Once you have her attention, begin Chapter 2. I wish you all the best of luck!_

Kakashi shut 'Ways to Charm a Kunoichi' with a soft bang. He wouldn't have much of a problem with getting noticed. After all, he was THE Kakashi Hatake. Only a person living under a rock wouldn't have heard of him. But, what if he didn't look good enough?

Kakashi went into his bathroom and took a good look at himself in the mirror. He looked pretty okay. However, his hair was a royal mess. Kakashi grabbed a comb and furiously ran it through his gray mop. Finally, after twenty whole minutes, he was satisfied with the way his hair looked. Then, the Copy Ninja cut his nails and sprayed a bit of cologne under his arms.

Kakashi grinned under his mask. He looked ready to go.

**A/N: Please review and tell me what you thought of the second chapter! I need three reviews for this chapter to go on to the third one, so please, for the sweet sake of the Lord, review!**


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